a case of a childhood impaired by molestation

Saturday, July 30, 2011


we all make mistakes.
but do we recognize them?
do they weigh in your stomach?
do they break your heart?

we put ourselves in these situations,
But do not know how to react.

clouded judgments and denial.

Denial...maybe i need help. maybe i need a therapist. maybe.
i don't know.

i am so much weaker than people perceive me to be.
weaken, mislead and confused.
sometimes i imagine myself..more perfect.
then you know..something happens...and it shows me,
i'm still just that stupid scared girl in
grade school...
high school..
day after day
year after year.

the infliction of pain and heartache,
the bond of trust and friendship over in a second.

words are strong and powerful things.
masochistic by nature.
theses things i say,
these things i do.
i don't understand.
i will never understand.

1 comment:

  1. what actually happens when an adult molests a child is that an enmeshment occurs...the little girl realizes in less than a moment that she is all alone in this abuse. she cannot tell anyone without the whole world coming apart around her: cops at the door, people crying and screaming, lawyers or court scenes or what-have-you. one little girl is suddenly responsible for holding up the whole house of cards. there is no way out. well, let me tell you, honey, it takes a mighty smart kid to keep all that shit together and lead that double life and keep everything normal on the outside while that innocent little angel suffers silently on the inside.