i believe it's something that i will never really recover from completely.
by this, i do not mean i am not normal. i can and do live a normal life.
it's just something that i have realized over time... this is part of me.
whether i like it or not, its there. it happened, and i was affected.
by this, i do not mean i am not normal. i can and do live a normal life.
it's just something that i have realized over time... this is part of me.
whether i like it or not, its there. it happened, and i was affected.
by saying that, what i mean is, it's something that stays with you. forever.
ever changing innocence...sometimes catching a glimpse of saturday morning cartoons makes me rememeber the forgotten.... makes me relive it, for a disgusting instance.
yes, you will recover! you'll get your balance back, you'll have complete control of your responses to things, you'll understand exactly what happened to you and why these things play out the way they do... it's a process but there is a day of complete recovery...you'll just hang up your spurs and walk away from it. it won't haunt you or hurt you after that. this is a process of learning and of grieving a lost childhood and of anger and resentment, of bad dreams and zillions of things that can trigger a memory and throw one right back into blackness. it's a process of blending back together all the disaggregated parts of one's mind. these things do heal, given time and nurturing. you betcha! one day it will be completely healed over! trust me on this one!
ReplyDelete